Saturday, June 16, 2012

Sleepover

The tiny window-sill wrapped around the essence of the room, outlined in white cedar. It contained four small corridors, which could barely fit a grown man. And all along I was just sitting on the computer chair watching you sleep.

It smells of beer, and clothes are scattered all across the floor, and anything that has a shelf. The cat has permanently rested upon the many layers of blankets randomly selected on top of your bed.
With each type I hear the click of the keys on the keyboard, as the chair makes tiny squeaks as I gently re-adjust my posture. My toes become chilled and the tiny hairs on my legs are standing upright.

Upstairs your mom moves, and I am so scared she is about to trudge down the stairs, and I am stuck without a way to hide. The cat purrs louder and I can barely hear myself think... its gone... and just like that I am back to watching you sleep.

My sock once white, now is a stained brown-yellowish mould slowly creeping from my toes to my heals in the escape to find a new clean surface to dirty. I wish to grab each paper scattered along the floor and start a snowball-paper war and watch us laugh in endless delight... but I am just here sitting on a chair, wishing we were laughing, but we aren't and probably wont be today.

The clock is now 9:24am and you still seem to be engulfed in all the many blankets on your chamber. And I am growing thin of being a sacrifice to the one room at the end of the hall. Soon enough you will awake, and I as well as you must carefully release ourselves from the house and climb into the vehicle that awaits its carriers.

I look back and you have repositioned yourself so your face is looking at mine, I smile and turn away.

Tiny footsteps cause my gaze to shift upwards and count the seconds until an intruder passes the hallway connecting this dungeon I feel I have been in for days-- yet its only been a few minutes.

*Knock* *Knock*
It's your brother, hungover and stumbling into his bedroom, he gives me the oddest glance, smiles and turns around. It was as if he knew this was an odd encounter yet he was in approval. I missed your brother, well I miss him...

I carefully adjust my position, wiggle my toes, crack my back and slowly but calmly head towards you... sitting next to this lifeless body, I brush my ever so tainted lips on your warm cheek, slyly glide my left hand over your shaggy hair and watch you inhale and exhale. I know the next moment wont be pretty...

You look straight into my blood-shot eyes from the lack of sleep I gained-- I didn't want to wake up and not be connected to you in some way. Groggy, confused, dazed you wonder why I am perched next to you at such an hour on a Saturday. Sadly I must go and you aren't pleased. Silently we sneak upstairs, and manage to leave the house without a sound, success!

The drive in this teal box contains my tears and stains my sleeves. You push me out into the rain, and all I have left to see is the smoke your tires have left. You said nothing, yet that was enough for me to understand...

I felt safe at one point... now I am in a new unknown area of a timeless clock that wont tell me the time and I am not sure which corridor I am in. All I know is yet again I am sitting behind a screen typing and there is no one in the bed.

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